Shameless Games

I have expensive tastes. When we go out, I prefer the motorcycle to the car. I also prefer the gourmet bistro for dinner, and expensive French macarons for dessert. Especially with food and drinks like coffee or tea… I will buy the best and serve it to myself exactly as I like it. No compromises. […]

Read More Shameless Games


One of my biggest lessons these days has been consequences. There are consequences to failure. At first, it felt like the more spectacular the failure, the greater the consequences. But then I laughed. The size of the consequence is defined by me. In regards to my latest failures… While it would be unwise to completely […]

Read More Consequences

Sith Yantra

As I took up studying Kali Ma, I discovered Yantras. Yantra is a mystical diagram, mainly from the Tantric traditions of the Indian religions. They are used for the worship of deities in temples or at home; as an aid in meditation; used for the benefits given by their supposed occult powers based on Hindu […]

Read More Sith Yantra


Rejection/recognition/approval is the issue I have been accused of having. I don’t deny it, but the problem is that killing this monster is something that must be done in private. It’s killed by accepting my outsider position and finding a form of comfort in it knowing that I am the person I wish to be. […]

Read More Rejection

The Sith

A long time ago… in a galaxy far far away… there came people who wanted to take the concept of the Force and adapt it to New Age studies. They became known as Force Realist communities and they relied heavily on terminology based off of the Star Wars franchise. They began defining the Force, the […]

Read More The Sith


I once called darkness the shroud I willfully pulled around myself to block out the disturbances that would seek to distract me from my goals. That only by invoking such brutal night, could I focus on my singular fiery passion and turn into a consuming flame.

Read More Darkness


Kali is a dark force of nature. Naked, primal, and victorious in battle. She is the destroyer and the nurturer. She is the black-skinned goddess of time, change, and conflict. Why did I float to her? I tend to be intuitive with my directions. I feel a pull that hints at a reason and then […]

Read More Kali

Black Meditation

I perform this mediation in the dark early morning. I sit up and hold my back straight. My hands are on my knees. I begin to breath slow, holding my breath for a few controlled counts, and then releasing it for the same measure. Only when I have it controlled do I know I’m awake […]

Read More Black Meditation